Our family photographer does boudoir shoots a couple of times a year. Every time she posted about offering them, I thought the same thing that most everyone else does – NO WAY!
Until last year.
I took the leap and decided to do a boudoir shoot.
In January 2017, I had just started on Jenny Craig and although I was down about 12 lbs, I still weighed 241 lbs.
I thought this would be a great gift for Tom on our 10th anniversary (together, not 10 years married) in February 2017.
What I learned was a boudoir shoot was more for me. Doing a boudoir shoot when I was fat and often felt ugly reminded me that I am a beautiful, sexy woman. Yes, I'm a busy mom that runs around like her head is cut off most days, but I'm also that beautiful woman. You don't have to be one or the other.
Moms like to be sexy. *gasp*
There, I said it.
Now if you're still thinking there's no way you'd ever do this, stop that now. The reason I wanted to share my experience with a plus size boudoir shoot is that I'm so tired of seeing these beautiful women I know comment on facebook posts about boudoir photography saying how much they'd love to do it but… “I need to lose X lbs”.
The way I see it, the man that I sleep with every night loves me for me. He sees me every morning when I wake up, seen me carry two children, helped me shower after a c-section, helped me squat over the toilet after those c-sections, and a ton of other not-so-pretty moments. That's real life and that's love, ladies.
I want to share a few tips that are applicable to absolutely ANY size woman that is thinking about doing a boudoir session. I was going to give tips for the plus-size ladies like myself, but the truth is – no one is really 100% comfortable with their body, no matter their size.
Book a Photographer You're Comfortable With
I've known our family photographer for about twenty years. She used to cheer with my stepsister and we went to the same middle and high schools. She has done our family photos for almost six years at this point.
For your boudoir session, you'll likely be wearing skimpy clothes or lingerie, so you can take out some of the awkwardness of that just by knowing your photographer ahead of time.
Start a Secret Pinterest Board
I searched Pinterest for plus-size boudoir poses and pinned the ones that I really liked to my secret pin board. These women all looked beautiful and I wanted to try to recreate something like that for myself.
I showed these pictures to my photographer the day of my shoot and we made sure to work a few of them in.
Have Hair and Makeup Done Professionally
I'm not a makeup person. I keep things super basic with a little foundation, some powder, and gloss most days. Even if you think you can do your own makeup, I highly recommend having someone else do it. It could be a professional in a fancy salon, someone that does it from home, or just someone that knows their way around a makeup kit!
And if they ask if you want lashes, just say yes! Enjoy the pampering and while it may seem a little over-the-top, the pictures will look killer!
Wear Something That You're Comfortable In
I wanted to wear lingerie, but I didn't have any that fit. So… that meant a trip to Lane Bryant for some great plus-size lingerie that actually fit me. I found a bunch of pretty little things and tried them all on in the store to make sure I would be comfortable with what I was wearing.
Of course, boudoir photography does not have to mean you're in skimpy lingerie. Want to wear an oversized tee and a pair of boy shorts? Do it!
This is all about you! Have fun with it! If you're having fun, it'll definitely come through in the photos. If you're feeling stiff and uncomfortable, that's going to come through, too.
Show Those Pics Off!
When you get your pictures back, show them off! If you need to take a minute, do that, but don't get in your head too much. You're probably going to immediately look for your flaws in your photos. The truth is – no one else is going to notice.
Show them to your husband, text them to a friend, post a few on social, but get them out there.
While we'd like to pretend that the opinion of others doesn't matter, the support you'll receive will make you feel amazing, friend!
Advice from Samantha Harter Photography, my photographer that took all of these photos:
- Be comfortable in your own body
- Remember they love you for you
- Wear something you feel comfortable in
The bottom line is have fun and be yourself!
If you've been thinking about doing a boudoir session, but don't think you're thin enough or pretty enough or whatever it is… you are! Seeing yourself as beautiful and sexy is unbelievably good for the soul. Put on your big girl panties (or don't) and go rock what you got!